The Bad Decision-Making Of The Drug Fried Minds Of The People That Live In San Francisco

By Karma Harris

The social echo-chamber is a terrible thing.

Like drones, or robots or sheep, the mindless clones in San Francisco seem to be unable to see that they, in their cult-like quest for "individuality" are doing the exact same idiotic thing that every other San Franciscan is doing:

- Getting a giant eagle, crown or flower tattoo on their chest above their boobs

- Wearing a Fedora hat

- Growing a handle-bar mustache or stupid-looking Amish beard

- Making their clothes look like they accidentally exposed their look-at-me desperation tattoo

- Taking pictures of themselves making idiotic duck lips

- Wearing a plaid shirt

- Being obese and wearing a belly shirt

- Being obese and wearing a tube top

- Being obese and wearing Betty Boop make-up

- Thinking that heroin makes you look cool

- Study an "Art Career" at a commercial "Institute" your rich sucker parents pay you to smoke pot at

- Being a grown-up who uses a skate-board or push scooter

- Wearing a spandex T-Shirt and pursing your lips because you want to be gay and "with it"

- Using the phrase "sociability nexus" or any other Tech BS-speak

- Worshiping Google

- Wearing all black at night because nobody else thought of that

- Thinking that your "pot cafe" idea is original, unique and will last more than 3 months

- Paying tens times more for food because it has tofu hidden in it

- Blindly mouthing any party line pretext that Nancy Pelosi tells them to

- Getting scabies every weekend at the 1050 Folsom night-club

- Tweeting as if anything you do matters to anybody

- Hiding your mental illness by saying and dressing "gender fluid"-like

- Getting a pack of tattoos that proudly announce your bad decision making

- Getting a pack of tattoos that proudly announce you are a slut

- Owning a fluorescent colored bicycle

- Creating a start-up that sells nothing that anybody actually needs or wants but has an ironic name

- Talking about "Burning Man" with any other sense than shame

- Going to a "TED Conference" without realizing you are a douche bag

- Using Match.com to get free dinners

- Having no ability whatsoever to consider the consequences of your actions

- Not seeing that the SF Board of Supes are all elitist stock market inside traders abusing the City

- Having six room-mates

- Pooping in the street because you embrace the "multi-cultural experience"

- Having no clue how the real world works

- Being a woman at Stanford University without knowing the Frats just see you as a baby oven

- Being a white yuppie guy with a Chinese girlfriend who doesn't not realize what the real deal is

- Not knowing why you feel you NEED to go to Starbucks